What i wouldn’t give for something to lean on right now. I’ve given up my bed to guests and I’m sleeping on an air mattress in my office, a cavernous room at the back of the house with a creaky floor that sounds its alarm whenever I move. I think a lot in here though. This is where the serious work really gets done. When I’m not sleeping in it, which is usually, it serves as my office and is also where I do stretch and meditate. The wall-to-wall closet at the end of the room has sliding, mirrored doors, useful for confidence-building or alignment but creepy otherwise. i lived in another house like this here too, a large box with mirrored closet doors throughout the house and a spiral staircase. it was like you could never escape yourself. i mean, i get it, but still…

So here I am on an air mattress in the middle of this larger room. I feel adrift on it.

There is nothing to lean on, so I’m driven to complete this thought ride by the desire to lie down. There’s a point in my cycle that’s pretty rational, and I’m in it. Without something to lean on, this is too hard to do.

I’m more interested in dreaming right now.